Perceptions of Endings: A Journey Through Different Perspectives by Elmer Luncsford

As we close out 2024, we often find ourselves thinking about how the end of the current year will bring hope for new beginnings in the year to come. Most things come to an end in one way or another, but how do you perceive that “end” and what is its significance? Maybe it's the final pages of a book you’ve spent weeks immersed in, or the closing moments of a concert you've been eagerly waiting to see. Or perhaps it's the end of a chapter in your life—a relationship, a job, or even a long-held dream. How does that feel? Is it relief? Sadness? Excitement? Or perhaps all three at once?

Endings are complicated. They can be heavy with emotion, filled with a sense of finality or opportunity. But here's the interesting part: not everyone experiences the end of something in the same way. In fact, endings themselves are often shaped by the perspectives we bring to them. Some see endings as inevitable closures; others see them as opportunities for new beginnings. Some dread them, while others seek them. So, how do different people perceive endings? And how can understanding those differences offer us greater clarity about how we navigate our own?

For many people, endings are associated with a sense of closure—a conclusion that marks the end of a story, a relationship, or a chapter in life. These endings often feel like doors closing, never to be opened again. It’s the kind of ending where you walk out of a theater after a movie and are left with the feeling that the story is now *over*. The credits roll, the lights come up, and you must return to the real world. For some, this moment is powerful—it brings everything into focus. They can see the narrative arc completed, and there's a sense of satisfaction, even if bittersweet. For others, this kind of closure can feel jarring or even unnerving. It's as if the finality of an ending forces them to confront the reality that something they've grown attached to, something they’ve invested time or emotions in, is now finished. And here lies the tension: we often feel a need for resolution, but we also fear the finality of it. There’s an anxiety in knowing something has reached its end, and there’s no going back. We’re left to wonder: What now? Is there more to learn? Or is this all there is?

Take the example of a job loss, or even the end of a personal relationship. For some, these endings can feel like a chapter being closed forever, leaving behind unanswered questions. The fear of “never again” can overshadow the potential for growth or renewal. The finality of the ending can paralyze us in a way that makes moving forward seem impossible. On the other hand, some people see endings through a much more optimistic, “glass half full” lens. Rather than focusing on the closing of one door, they focus on the opening of another. "Endings are just beginnings in disguise," as the saying goes. This perspective often comes from a place of hope and possibility. These individuals believe that every end—whether a relationship, a job, or a phase of life—carries with it the seed of something new, something yet to be discovered.

Think of a graduation ceremony, where the end of schooling is not viewed with sadness, but with celebration. It’s not the end of learning, but the beginning of new opportunities. Similarly, when we leave one job for another, or when we end a relationship, it can create space for personal reinvention and growth. In this view, an ending is not a closing of doors but a preparation for something new to come into focus. This approach can be empowering. It helps us approach endings not with grief, but with anticipation. But here’s the challenge: it requires a deep trust in the future. It requires belief that what’s ahead will be better, or at least just as meaningful, as what we’re leaving behind. For some, this optimism can feel naive—especially when endings involve loss or uncertainty. But for others, it’s the only way forward. They don’t see endings as loss; they see them as necessary transitions, a step in the ongoing cycle of life.

There are those who find endings difficult, not because they fear closure or cherish beginnings, but because they are reluctant to let go of what has been. They resist endings because they have grown too attached to the status quo, to the known, to what they’ve already built. The thought of moving on—of letting go of a part of themselves—feels unsettling. This is where we get into the psychological concept of *endowment effect*, the tendency for people to overvalue what they have simply because it is theirs. Whether it’s a relationship, a habit, or even a job, people often resist endings because they are emotionally attached to the past. It’s as if they are walking away from a part of their identity. The question is, can we find a way to accept endings without fearing what we might be losing?

For these individuals, the very act of moving forward feels like abandonment. This resistance can manifest in many ways—whether through staying in unfulfilling jobs or relationships, or avoiding necessary changes out of a fear that the next phase may not be as rewarding, or worse, that it may lead to emptiness. The paradox here is that, by resisting endings, they may unknowingly block themselves from creating the space they need for something new and perhaps more fulfilling.

Age and experience also play a crucial role in how we perceive endings. Younger people, often full of energy and ambition, may see endings with a sense of urgency. The idea of closing one chapter in order to open another is often seen as exciting, as part of a life filled with potential. In contrast, older individuals may have a more measured view of endings, having lived through more of them and perhaps experienced deeper losses. For them, endings may carry with them a sense of melancholy, a recognition that with each ending comes a greater awareness of life’s fragility. But experience also grants perspective. Older generations, with the wisdom that comes from living through many changes, often view endings not with fear or resistance, but with acceptance. They have learned that endings are not so much about the loss of something, but about the continuation of life itself. This perspective can offer a sense of peace—the understanding that while things come to an end, the world keeps turning, and new beginnings will arise in their own time.

So, when it comes to endings, no one perspective is fully right or wrong. The way we perceive endings—whether with grief, relief, hope, or resistance—depends on where we stand in our journey, the experiences we’ve lived through, and the beliefs we hold about what comes next. But perhaps the most important thing we can do is to honor each perspective for what it offers us. If we can see endings as a natural part of the cycle of life—whether we face them with sadness, excitement, or even fear—we can begin to embrace the full richness of the human experience. We may find that endings don’t diminish us, but instead help us grow, evolve, and open ourselves to what lies ahead.